Rarely Home Mom

 Only Peeing Allowed

Knowing I would appreciate this kind of humor, my dad took this picture on vacation this week in Ohio (or New York or Maine or somewhere).

On the way to Jacob’s birthday lunch at Applebee’s, we stopped at our mailbox to pick up the mail.  There was a box for Jacob inside from my sister, Stacy.  I used my keys to get through the packing tape, opened the box lid, and looked at Jacob.

“Guess what she got you?!”

“What?”

“BUBBLE WRAP!”  I pulled out the bubble wrap and handed it to Jacob.

“Bubble wrap?  AWESOME!”

He is so very easy to please.  Pickles for Christmas and bubble wrap for his birthday. 

(there was more than bubble wrap in the box, but that was his favorite part of the present.  by far.)

Want to make me really upset really quickly?  Tell me that you think it’s right to pay teachers based on their students test scores.

Here in Utah, the state has started approving districts plans to implement merit based pay.  And I’m pretty pissed about it, even though I’m no longer teaching in public school.

I just can not wrap my head around the logic of people who believe it is fair or right to pay teachers that way.  You think it will make them work harder?  Take their job more seriously?  What an insult.

Four of my teaching years were spent at a Title 1 school.  The kids largely came from low-income homes, very crowded houses (not uncommon to have 10 people or more in a small 2 bedroom apartment), and many were very new to the United States and the English language.  I taught lots of students who had parents in prison, students who had very young parents, students who scarfed their school breakfast and lunch because they might not get dinner. 

As a school, you bet our test scores were low.  Our distric was large.  Other schools in our distric taught children who had doctors, lawyers and scientists for parents; kids who lived in multi-million dollar homes.  Kids who had nannies and tutors and extra curricular activities and vacations and good, positive life experiences.   

Would my “trying harder” as a teacher really help?  COULD I even try harder?  I was working my butt off.  I loved those children and desperately wanted them to succeed.  Would all the love and effort on my part ever raise those test scores?  No.  If a kid came to me knowing no English and reading not one word of English - likely not even knowing many letter sounds or names - at the beginning of first grade, I was thrilled when I helped that child get to mid-first grade reading level at the end of the year.  Thrilled.  Other schools in the district could easily show end of year tests where their first graders were reading at a 3rd grade level.  Good for them!  Truly.  I’m sure it took a lot of work on the part of the parents, student and teacher.  But I worked just as hard, my students likely worked harder, and we rarely had parental support.  You’re going to pay me less?

Chime in if you wish.

Adult doing sharing time lesson: What do you say to a friend who says they don’t have a church to go to on Sundays?

4 year old: Too bad, I do.  (tone of voice: bummer for you)

*We’re healthy. Praise the high heavens we’re finally healthy around here.  It’s been 2 weeks of poop and puke and we’re done.  Unless I just jinxed the situation, which is entirely possible.  I think I have 9 loads of laundry waiting for me tomorrow.

*Jacob turns 4 tomorrow.  He won’t let me make his birthday cake, so I took his party away.  JUST KIDDING.  The cake story: I was set to make this really cool 3D dinosaur birthday cake.  Jacob was excited for the dinosaur cake, which he requested be dark green, light green and turquoise.  On Friday Jacob was shopping at Costco with me and decided he HAD to have “a balloon cake from the store - THIS balloon cake from THIS store”.  So, fine.  That’s what he’s getting.  I’m not going to all that work if he’s going to cry when I stick a candle on top because it’s the wrong cake.  The party story: we had originally thought that we’d have a small kid party at our house.  Then we had The Sick here for 2 weeks and no energy to plan or execute said party.  Solution: tomorrow is All-About-Jacob day.  He has requested lunch at Applebee’s (the kids corn dog meal), a trip to Thanksgiving Point, and playing with bubbles.  He shall be granted all those wishes.  For the “party”, we’ll have some neighbors over for cake at night.  Everyone will be happy.

*One of Angelina Jolie’s new babies has the name Knox.  What do I think of?  Johnny Knoxville and Knox gelatin.  What does Nathan think of?  General Henry Knox.  We’re different, us two (she says while flipping pages of People magazine, while her husband sits next to her thumbing through his Wall Street Journal). 

*If you have an electronic device you love, keep it away from me.  The camera is being mailed into the shop tomorrow.  We took the computer into the shop Friday night.  I dropped it twice in one minute.  Everything was fine after the first drop.  After the second, the screen did that shatter thing.  Nice.  Thankfully, it’s under warranty for about 2  more weeks.  Lucky timing.  So now I not only have my good camera, but no computer to upload pictures of my children onto and send them to poor, unsuspecting family members.  My grandma will surely disappointed, but I bet everyone else is thankful for the breather. 

*Ainsley Jane made her debut at church today.  Just cracked me up looking at all the other 2 and 3 month old babies because, holy cow they were HUGE!  Big!  As in: why are those kids not walking yet??  Whenever people comment that Ainsley is “so tiny”, I look at them as if they are insane, because I see a giant when I look at all 8 pounds 2 ounces of her 8 week old adorable baby body.   I think we can agree that my perception of baby sizes is very off.  I have forgotten that Joshua was 8 lbs 11 oz at BIRTH.  Also have forgotten that she just barely graduated from preemie clothes and newborn diapers.

Joshua had a blood draw today.  I had Josh on my lap during the stick, and Jacob was about 10 feet away in a waiting room chair, waiting and watching.  Joshua did amazingly well.  He flinched, he was sad, he said “ouch! you hurt my arm!”  Not bad, right?  Especially considering he’s 2 and he had to be poked FOUR times until the blood would come easily.

Our issue?  Jacob.  From 10 feet away we hear him shouting “Don’t HURT my BROTHER!  STOP poking HIM!  I’m coming to RESCUE HIM! Don’t hurt him!”

I wanted to melt into the chair.  I’m glad that Jacob wants to protect his brother and all, but ouch - to talk that way to adults?  I’m trying to focus on the positive right now: Jacob is going to be his brother’s best protector.

I love Erin’s blog, Full House, Full Hands, Full Hearts.  She is the mom to 11kids: 3 biological, 8 adopted.  Two of her Ethiopian children, Belane and Solomon, have HIV, and now, Erin works as the HIV adoption coordinator for Adoption Advocates International - the agency we plan on using when it’s time for our next adoption.  Today she had a post up about how quickly the HIV adoption programs have grown.  Amazing.  She has a personal Tell Two Campaign, where she encouraged everyone who reads her blog to tell two people the FACTS about HIV.  I have to admit that every once in awhile, when I think about our next adoption, the thought of considering a child with HIV comes up.  Is it something we’re going to do?  I don’t know.  Very likely not.  The thought of having people react negatively to my child and to our family saddens me.  The thought of losing a child terrifies me.  Thinking about watching my child go through chronic illness breaks my heart.  But there is a tiny possibility, and it’s something we’ll think, talk, and pray about a bit in the future.  We’ve got quite a bit of time before the next adoption, anyhow.  In the meantime.  DID YOU KNOW:

- HIV can NOT be spread through causal/household contact. HIV is not spread through hugging, kissing, shaking hands, sharing toys, sneezing, coughing, sharing food, sharing drinks, bathing, swimming or any other causal way. It has been proven that HIV and AIDS can only be spread through sexual contact, birth, breastfeeding and blood to blood contact (such as sharing needles).

- HIV is now considered a chronic but manageable disease. With treatment, people who are HIV+ can live indefinitely without developing AIDS and can live long and full lives.

- People who are HIV+ deserve to be treated with love, respect, support and acceptance as all people do.

If anyone wants more info on transmission, there is great info on the Center for Disease Control website at http://www.cdc.gov/hiv/resources/factsheets/transmission.htm

Help me spread the truth about HIV, and take a tiny stab at the stigma against HIV. Tell your friend when you talk on the phone. Tell your spouse. Tell your parents. Post it on your blog and ask other people to tell their readers. Ask them to pass it on as well.  I would love to see this spread beyond the adoption blogs.

Even if you have no real interest in HIV/AIDS, even if you are not involved in adoption, even if you don’t think you know anyone who is HIV+… education and knowledge are always a good thing. It is so easy to say to someone, “hey, guess what I learned today?” and it is even easier to put it on a blog or in an email.

Do it for me. Do it for the other adoptive families and the HIV+ orphans that are waiting for homes. Do it for Belane and Solomon. Do it for all of the other people on this planet living with HIV.  If everyone that reads this blog tells at least two people, that is a whole bunch of people we can reach and a little bit of difference we can make.

This is Julie again.  Will you tell two?

Nathan got the mail yesterday and we had a big brown envelope from Amazon. I wondered what it was - I hadn’t ordered anything lately. It was Don’s book, You Can’t Go to School Naked!

We had pre-ordered the book several months ago so we could have it in our hands as soon as it came out and finally see what we’d been hearing about for several years. The verdict? We loved it! It’s a cute story and the illustrations are just perfect for it. We’re excited for Don and Dianne. And how cool for us to say we know a real life author and illustrator.

Edit: Don is husband of Katie, and a way talented artist.  He helped design the Olympic torch in Salt Lake.  Wow.  They’re our good friends we met in California.  Dianne is Katie’s mom, who we also know and love.  She is the quintessential Grandma.

Ainsley Jane is —><— this close to being 8 pounds. YEAH! It only took close to 2 months, which is really great considering that she has gained 3 lbs in 7 weeks. For a slow start like hers, that is absolutely fabulous. You know what that means? Size one diapers, here we come!

(”You made it!” is something the boys came up with and have thought hilarious since San Diego in March.  Brother 1 will go up to the Brother 2 and in a really excited voice say “You made it!”, greeting brother 2 with a hug, a kiss, and excited jumping.)

Nathan and I got the flu this weekend.  The kind of flu where you can’t move, other than to the bathroom and then on the floor near the bathroom, or the nearest couch/bed to the bathroom.  Jacob is almost all the way better.  Josh and Ainsley are fine, so far.  I’m keeping my fingers crossed and prayers said that those two will be ok because this flu is a brutal, icky, ugly one.  I’m almost human today, Nathan is not quite to the human stage yet.  It’s never fun to be sick, but super discouraging when we’ve been extra, extra careful about hand washing and bleaching everything down.   I think it’s really uncool that both adults in this house got so sick at the same time.

The last time I was this sick, Nathan and I were sick together.  It was December 2005, and we were actually worse than this, if that seems possible.  We thought we had food poisoning.  KayLyn took Jacob all day Monday, and until 2 am Tuesday morning, when he started throwing up, too.  Then we decided it wasn’t food poisoning.  She brought him home in a pink outfit that said “Adorable”.

Nathan and I really need to schedule our sicknesses around each other better.